CHAPTER XVIL
Dr. Riccabocca had secured Lenny Fairfield, and might therefore be
considered to have ridden his hobby in the great whirligig with
adroitness and success. But Miss Jemima was still driving round in her
car, handling the reins, and flourishing the whip, without apparently
having got an inch nearer to the flying form of Dr. Riccabocca.
Indeed, that excellent and only too susceptible spinster, with all her
experience of the villany of man, had never conceived the wretch to be so
thoroughly beyond the reach of redemption as when Dr. Riccabocca took his
leave, and once more interred himself amidst the solitudes of the Casino,
and without having made any formal renunciation of his criminal celibacy.
For some days she shut herself up in her own chamber, and brooded with
more than her usual gloomy satisfaction on the certainty of the
approaching crash. Indeed, many signs of that universal calamity, which,
while the visit of Riccabocca lasted, she had permitted herself to
consider ambiguous, now became luminously apparent. Even the newspaper,
which during that credulous and happy period had given half a column to
Births and Marriages, now bore an ominously long catalogue of Deaths; so
that it seemed as if the whole population had lost heart, and had no
chance of repairing its daily losses. The leading article spoke, with
the obscurity of a Pythian, of an impending CRISIS. Monstrous turnips
sprouted out from the paragraphs devoted to General News. Cows bore
calves with two heads, whales were stranded in the Humber, showers of
frogs descended in the High Street of Cheltenham.
All these symptoms of the world's decrepitude and consummation, which by
the side of the fascinating Riccabocca might admit of some doubt as to
their origin and cause, now, conjoined with the worst of all, namely, the
frightfully progressive wickedness of man,--left to Miss Jemima no ray of
hope save that afforded by the reflection that she could contemplate the
wreck of matter without a single sentiment of regret.
Mrs. Dale, however, by no means shared the despondency of her fair
friend, and having gained access to Miss Jemima's chamber, succeeded,
though not without difficulty, in her kindly attempts to cheer the
drooping spirits of that female misanthropist. Nor, in her benevolent
desire to speed the car of Miss Jemima to its hymeneal goal, was Mrs.
Dale so cruel towards her male friend, Dr. Riccabocca, as she seemed to
her husband. For Mrs. Dale was a woman of shrewdness and penetration, as
most quick-tempered women are; and she knew that Miss Jemima was one of
those excellent young ladies who are likely to value a husband in
proportion to the difficulty of obtaining him. In fact, my readers of
both sexes must often have met, in the course of their experience, with
that peculiar sort of feminine disposition, which requires the warmth of
the conjugal hearth to develop all its native good qualities; nor is it
to be blamed overmuch if, innocently aware of this tendency in its
nature, it turns towards what is best fitted for its growth and
improvement, by laws akin to those which make the sunflower turn to
the sun, or the willow to the stream. Ladies of this disposition,
permanently thwarted in their affectionate bias, gradually languish
away into intellectual inanition, or sprout out into those abnormal
eccentricities which are classed under the general name of "oddity" or
"character." But once admitted to their proper soil, it is astonishing
what healthful improvement takes place,--how the poor heart, before
starved and stinted of nourishment, throws out its suckers, and bursts
into bloom and fruit. And thus many a belle from whom the beaux have
stood aloof, only because the puppies think she could be had for the
asking, they see afterwards settled down into true wife and fond mother,
with amaze at their former disparagement, and a sigh at their blind
hardness of heart.
In all probability Mrs. Dale took this view of the subject; and
certainly, in addition to all the hitherto dormant virtues which would be
awakened in Miss Jemima when fairly Mrs. Riccabocca, she counted somewhat
upon the mere worldly advantage which such a match would bestow upon the
exile. So respectable a connection with one of the oldest, wealthiest,
and most popular families in the shire would in itself give him a
position not to be despised by a poor stranger in the land; and though
the interest of Miss Jemima's dowry might not be much, regarded in the
light of English pounds (not Milanese lire), still it would suffice to
prevent that gradual process of dematerialization which the lengthened
diet upon minnows and sticklebacks had already made apparent in the fine
and slow-evanishing form of the philosopher.
Like all persons convinced of the expediency of a thing, Mrs. Dale saw
nothing wanting but opportunities to insure its success. And that these
might be forthcoming she not only renewed with greater frequency, and
more urgent instance than ever, her friendly invitations to Riccabocca to
drink tea and spend the evening, but she so artfully chafed the squire on
his sore point of hospitality, that the doctor received weekly a pressing
solicitation to dine and sleep at the Hall.
At first the Italian pished and grunted, and said /Cospetto/, and /Per
Bacco/, and /Diavolo/, and tried to creep out of so much proffered
courtesy. But like all single gentlemen, he was a little under the
tyrannical influence of his faithful servant; and Jackeymo, though he
could bear starving as well as his master when necessary, still, when he
had the option, preferred roast beef and plum-pudding. Moreover, that
vain and incautious confidence of Riccabocca touching the vast sum at his
command, and with no heavier drawback than that of so amiable a lady as
Miss Jemima--who had already shown him (Jackeymo) many little delicate
attentions--had greatly whetted the cupidity which was in the servant's
Italian nature,--a cupidity the more keen because, long debarred its
legitimate exercise on his own mercenary interests, he carried it all to
the account of his master's!
Thus tempted by his enemy and betrayed by his servant, the unfortunate
Riccabocca fell, though with eyes not unblinded, into the hospitable
snares extended for the destruction of his--celibacy! He went often to
the Parsonage, often to the Hall, and by degrees the sweets of the social
domestic life, long denied him, began to exercise their enervating charm
upon the stoicism of our poor exile. Frank had now returned to Eton. An
unexpected invitation had carried off Captain Higginbotham to pass a few
weeks at Bath with a distant relation, who had lately returned from
India, and who, as rich as Creesus, felt so estranged and solitary in his
native isle that, when the captain "claimed kindred there," to his own
amaze "he had his claims allowed;" while a very protracted sitting of
parliament still delayed in London the squire's habitual visitors during
the later summer; so that--a chasm thus made in his society--
Mr. Hazeldean welcomed with no hollow cordiality the diversion or
distraction he found in the foreigner's companionship. Thus, with
pleasure to all parties, and strong hopes to the two female conspirators,
the intimacy between the Casino and Hall rapidly thickened; but still not
a word resembling a distinct proposal did Dr. Riccabocca breathe. And
still, if such an idea obtruded itself on his mind, it was chased
therefrom with so determined a Diavolo that perhaps, if not the end of
the world, at least the end of Miss Jemima's tenure in it, might have
approached and seen her still Miss Jemima, but for a certain letter with
a foreign postmark that reached the doctor one Tuesday morning.
